Cranquis: Well that tiny slightly-tender scabbed area in your groin, which is “already much smaller than it was yesterday”, looks like an ingrown hair to me, sir.
30-something Male Patient: No, I disagree.
Cranquis: What do you think it is?
Cranquis: Um, you said it only shows up after you shave your groin hair, about once every 6 months, and then goes away after 2 days. That doesn’t sound like any syphilis chancre I’ve ever heard of.
Patient: No, I looked it up online, and I think it’s syphilis. Plus I’ve noticed that my brain doesn’t work well sometimes, and that happens with syphilis too, right?
Cranquis (ignoring that too-easy opportunity for a sarcastic comment a la House): So you’re saying you have a syphilis chancre that goes away 2 days after it shows up, without any medication?
Patient: Well, I have a strong immune system, so I probably cure it on my own.
Cranquis (struggling not to cry or laugh at this point): Ok, let’s cut to the chase — did you just come in to get tested for syphilis today? Because I’m happy to order that lab test.
Patient: Oh, I don’t know, how much does that test cost? Cuz I can get tested online for $80 and I don’t have health insurance.
Cranquis: Way more than $80.
Patient: I’ll just come back some other time.
Cranquis: I’m so glad I could help you today.
it’s only helpful when the person looking through it doesn’t get hysterical XD
Yeah, I think that any Google search for medical symptoms should force a “signs of hypochondriasis” page to the top of the results list. >:E
(And 2nd place should be MY blog, of course). :)
The internet is great for research and general knowledge when it comes to health, but don’t forget that webMD shows you the worst case (and every case) scenario when it comes to a headache. Don’t forget that the blog you read, unless they are citing sources, cannot diagnose you or give accurate medical advice tailored to your body. I have said this before and I will continue to say it again and again: the internet cannot take the place of a physician’s opinion or advice and pseudoscience is not welcome here.
As I always say: The only doctor you should rely on is a doctor you can smell. :)