Dr. Cranquis' Mumbled Gripes

I'm an American physician who works in an Urgent Care clinic. I see lots of stupid or funny things that people do with-and-to their health. I cope by mumbling under my breath (and then posting about it on this pseudonymous blog). Thought you might be interested.

(Disclaimer: Questions related to medical topics will be answered to the best of Dr. Cranquis' (and Google's) knowledge, but the internet-delivered wisdom on this blog CAN NOT AND SHOULD NOT SUBSTITUTE for your Real-Life Doctor's personal attention + examination, and your own common sense too! If you think you're having a medical emergency, hang up and go email 911. The author of this blog takes no responsibility for any medical, relationship, scholastic, financial, or other decisions you may make based on information found in this blog.)

And since people seem to be a bit confused about this: any "real-sounding" patients names are just horrible puns, and not HIPAA violations.

Blogs I Follow

TSK: Pardon my chilly fingers.

6-year-old Belinda (during abdominal exam): Oh, your hands are cold!
Cranquis: I'm sorry - but thank you for warming them up for me!
Mother: You know, Belinda, doctors are required to have cold hands.
Cranquis: Yep, it's true. My best friend wanted to be a doctor, but his hands were always too warm, so they kicked him out of medical school.
Belinda: You guys are weird.