Dr. Cranquis' Mumbled Gripes

I'm an American physician who works in an Urgent Care clinic. I see lots of stupid or funny things that people do with-and-to their health. I cope by mumbling under my breath (and then posting about it on this pseudonymous blog). Thought you might be interested.

(Disclaimer: Questions related to medical topics will be answered to the best of Dr. Cranquis' (and Google's) knowledge, but the internet-delivered wisdom on this blog CAN NOT AND SHOULD NOT SUBSTITUTE for your Real-Life Doctor's personal attention + examination, and your own common sense too! If you think you're having a medical emergency, hang up and go email 911. The author of this blog takes no responsibility for any medical, relationship, scholastic, financial, or other decisions you may make based on information found in this blog.)

And since people seem to be a bit confused about this: any "real-sounding" patients names are just horrible puns, and not HIPAA violations.

Blogs I Follow

TSK: Not knowing is 100% of the battle

Cranquis: So what antibiotic was your son taking for his ear infection last month?
Dad: I... don't know. Let me ask my wife. *cell phone call* Ok, it was azithromycin.
TIME PASSES:
Cranquis: You said your son doesn't have any allergies to medicine, but his chart says 'Penicillin'. Can you explain that?
Dad: Uh... let me ask my wife. *cell phone call* Ok, he gets a rash from penicillin.
TIME PASSES:
Cranquis: What pharmacy should I send his prescriptions to?
Dad: Oh man, I don't know that either. Sorry. *cell phone call, punctuated by many 'I'm sorry' and 'Hey, calm down' phrases* Send it to Wal-Mart.
Patient and Dad leave the clinic, and TIME PASSES:
Secretary: Doc, I have Mr. Joe on the phone, he says he doesn't have his insurance card with him, and he doesn't remember his kid's social security number, and the pharmacy won't let him pick up the prescriptions without either of those, and is there ANYTHING you can do to help before he has to call his wife one more time?