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Dr. Cranquis' Mumbled Gripes

I'm an American physician who works in an Urgent Care clinic. I see lots of stupid or funny things that people do with-and-to their health. I cope by mumbling under my breath (and then posting about it on this pseudonymous blog). Thought you might be interested.

(Disclaimer: Questions related to medical topics will be answered to the best of Dr. Cranquis' (and Google's) knowledge, but the internet-delivered wisdom on this blog CAN NOT AND SHOULD NOT SUBSTITUTE for your Real-Life Doctor's personal attention + examination, and your own common sense too! If you think you're having a medical emergency, hang up and go email 911. The author of this blog takes no responsibility for any medical, relationship, scholastic, financial, or other decisions you may make based on information found in this blog.)

And since people seem to be a bit confused about this: any "real-sounding" patients names are just horrible puns, and not HIPAA violations.

Blogs I Follow
  • Nurse Practitioner: How bad is your headache currently, on a scale from 0 to 10, with 10 being the worst pain ever?
  • 40-something female patient: 8, 8 and a half.
  • NP: Oh, my! So it's almost as bad as childbirth?
  • Patient: What, childbirth? Oh no no. If you compare it to childbirth, this is only a 4. I didn't realize you were talking about THAT kind of pain.
  1. kasiakeen reblogged this from cranquis
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  10. keakuki said: You should try this trick on a person with a kidney stone. Haha
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  21. claireleannep said: If childbirth is only an 8 then what is a 9? And I’m almost afraid to ask.. what is a 10?